It all started after my best friend died in a car wreck involving a drunk driver. I was so crushed, that the anxiety was still prominent a year after he died. In fact, it was getting worse. I started not sleeping, I went almost two weeks with no sleep,and when I did sleep, I was plagued by nightmares of my friend dying. The panic attacks were getting worse and I was beginning to experience visual hallucinations. There were people and things that apparently only I saw, and a nearly continuous whispering in my head. The first time I heard a voice, it was telling me nasty things. This voice has developed into a character called Francis, who tries his hardeest to make me miserable. I was waiting on my ride after a school play and I was crying and going into hysterics. People just stepped over me and kept walking. I didn’t know what was going on.
I tried a counselor, who refered me to a psychologist, who refered me to a psychiatrist. At first, they treated me for anxiety, but as time wore on, it became apparent that anxiety was not my only issue. Other characters developed, including Cyanide, my closest friend.
Right now, I am taking 600 mg of Seroquel for Schizophrenia and sleep disorders (we’ve tried Zyprexa and Abilify) 150mg of trazodone for anxiety and sleep disorders, and 10 mg of Lexapro, for depression. Except for the occasion seemingly random outburst during class, and one real scare when I had a hallucination one of my friends being shot in the head, I have gotten pretty good at ignoring Francis.
Now, Cyanide takes over and controls my body occasionally. No one really notices, and if they notice something different, they have no idea what is going on.
No one knows what is going on.
