Hello, This is what I’ve experienced. When I was a little kid, I always heared stuff, somehow I just tend to know things. I also saw things. When I was in school I always knew when I was going to be called on. Lots of times if I didnt know the answer I could sometimes just guess and Id get it right! But it didnt happen offten enough. When ever people talk to me I often know that they are going to talk about and usually say word for word. I never know Im going to know something untill right then or just moments before.
Lots of times Ill tell a story about something and a few days later it will happen on tv. Like Ill be telling my friend about a show and then it will come on. Ive seen but a few movies I dont know whats going to happen. I can almost always, just about 90% of the time tell you what time it is. The only 3 clocks in my house are this computer I got not that long ago, and my friends pc and alarm clock in his room. We have no down stairs clocks. I can guess what time it is within 20 mins every time. Usually im with in 5-6 mins. Ive always heard static. Like live voltage always surging. Often one ear will go deaf to all but a high pitch tone. As I grew I started to hear my name being called out, when I was alone. I often hear something like something is moving around but theres not.
The voices I hear are kinda cool. They help me out sometimes. Other times they mess with me but its all in fun. They like to say:(Hey! Look!), in a wisper and Ill look over and see a hot chick bent over or something cool like that. Their on it! They point out a lot of good stuff. Other times they just converse, and b/s with me. We joke around and talk crap and all the stuff you talk to all your other friends about.
Now Id like to tell you about seeing things. Ok, I know every kid thinks they see the boogie man, but what if your not afraid. I was scared of nothing lots of times, Im sure they messed with me a bit. But any thing I thought I could catch I could kill and not get in trouble for it. I always saw this little guy who looked like a cat. he was all white and had a top hat and monicle. he was about the size of a cat on its hind legs. THat little cat thing used to always stare at me and some times just laugh. I didnt get it. I wasnt doing anything when he came around. I was always just sitting there. He would nevr talk to me or dare come close. At first I was afriad. But he messed up and ran. letting me know he was scared. From that day on I knew I could destroy any of them. But theirs never been a need.
Their not my friends like the voices. I like the voices their cool. The things I see however arnt my frinds but I dont dislike them. Sometimes they do cool things to see or make sweet things happen. They always stay a distance away but a few times theyve come close but its been cool. The things I see can only be called that. I think them to be demons. They are never live people. I do see dead people when I drive and some times Im afraid one time the person standing in the street staring is going to be real. That would suck. Most of the time its some kinda beast looking thing. They always look mean but their not so bad. But all they do is come up and look at me.
I think the voices in my head are here to help me. I think the things I see are hear to just observe me, just keep an eye on me. I often think I maybe a mastermind power of evil like none other. Lots of times I really hear music clean and clear playing loudly. It plays whatever Im in that mood of thinking. If Im angry or just juiced up I hear death metal or psychobilly. When Im calm and just thinking I ofthen hear classical. I hear classical more then anything. I have always had a problem with keeping my thoughts in order. I cant consintrate sometimes. I kinda just drift off and the world around me disapears. If I just stare The whole world becomes gray and then whatevers on my mind is what I see.
I day dream as it were. This is all from when I was a little kid. When I was little their were only 2 people in the whole world I actually cared about. I always wanted them around. My grandpa from my mom, and my dad was the second. But not in that order. My parents devorsed when I was 4. I have a brother 13 months to the day younger. My brother and I lived good with our grandparents untill I was 8. Then we had to move in with our mom. Shes not a good mother to say the least. My brother and I had a really crappy life from then on. When I was 10 our dad died in a car wreck 3 days after my brothers birthday. We have another brother living somewhere with his horrible dad from our mom. My dad remarried soon after and gave us another brother and 2 sisters. They are all good people. A lot of doctors tell me this is why Im mess up. from my dad dying, and my less then happy upbringing.I am a musician. I play guitar and upright bass. Im very god and in fact think myself to one of the best.
Anyway I had a psychobilly band. Get that? schizo-psycho? Well, I did a lot of LSD. I mean I was droping 1 1/2, to 2 1/2 strips at a time. Yes strips. Thats 15 to 25 hits of acid at once. A lot of people think thats my prob. But I saw and heard things way before I ever tripped. I belive myself to be a grand master of LSD. If you know nothing about it, how it works and what it does, go find out now! In short it connects all the reseptors in your brain. Yes IT MAKES YOU SMARTER!!! By conecting everything it enlighens you.
I used to do a chinese meditaton called tai-chi. Its all about chi and and stuff. Look it up! With my studies of chi and LSD, I believe my self to be on another plane above evryone else. I can do things because on my use that other people will never be able to do. Using chi, I can make and physical thing I want in my hand and to me be 100% physical. Other people who I know can also do great things with their minds on LSD. If someone I know is tripping I can make them belive anything I want. I can even make people belive theyve forgotten how to read. I know a cop who once was doubting if he could read because he was drunk.
If you can physically make something like I can then I can change whatever youve made into whatever I want. I can melt it, just make it so hot you’ll drop it, or that cold, that you’ll start shivering. no matter what the real temp, and I can change it back and forth on you as I want. With LSD I can make new demintions. Ive stepped past real life. I can make a new world when ever I want. I think being schizo and a god from LSD use has been the greatest. I dont take meds or go to counsiling. When I was taking meds and talking to my doc, I was like a zombie and all my friends left me. I got real lonely. Everyone told me I looked like hell. Everyone was telling me a lot of stuff. You know what Ive found? Its all stuff bullstuff. How the hell can they claim to know whats going on in a crazys head when theyve never smoked a joint? Never played guitar high? Or god forbid trip and open their minds!
And I proved it. Heres how. I was taking all my meds. I mean to the T of when I was susposed to. I never missed one! I was trying to stop smoking pot but I love it soo much. The doc tell me to stop. But I never have. One day after my 3rd suicide atempt, I have lots of high power meds. I woke up and said F this, this isnt fun. I stoped taking my meds and started smoking more pot. No more meds, but I was still going to talk to the doc 1 times a week. After about 6 months of his b/s. He started to tell me I looked a lot better and that I was doing very well. All tanks to my meds and his help. Well about 4 months before was when I stoped the meds. As for his help, and ALL head doc. their full of crap. I never told them anything because the first time I talkd to someone and tryed to get help they locked me up. put me in a hospital/jail. And I never did anything wrong!
So like hell was I gonna tell them anything. BUt anyway. The day my doc said I was doing very well and was thinking about cutting back our meetings, I just told him outright what was up. That I stoped the meds months ago and that I never really told him anything only what he wanted to hear. Then as I had shut him down and made him feel stupid, I walkd out and never looked back. I disregaurded everything the docs told me and stopped taking my meds, and THEY said I was better! HAHAHAH!!! Docs are jokes! Now I live a lot easier. My friends are back, I hear the music again, and I see what I see.
